I do not feel well….. I actually feel pretty crappy. I do not remember the last time I felt good but I am sure it was prior to the cancer diagnosis. Feeling “great” has left my vocabulary. The cancer surgery was trauma to my body and the fear of all of it took its toll I am sure. Then the 21 radiation treatments caused me to be really tired, as the doctors said it would. I would have thought by now the tiredness would be over…but then I thought it should be over after a week. The doctor said it could take three to six months…it has been seven months.
Then my feet and ankles started swelling and stayed that way. I could only wear one pair of shoes. The skin stretched which made it feel like elastic on my legs and not a nice feeling. I have had this before but it went away at night. This time it did not go away at all. So another round of doctors visits. My cardiologist did an echogram..heart is fine. He said some of the elasticity was gone but was “age” related. On a scale of 1-4 it was probably a 1..not much for my age. He put me on Lasix meds for fluid and my regular doctor took me off it just as quickly because it depleted the salt in my blood to a critical level. She also added a pill so I wouldn’t have to go to the bathroom so much at night. No wonder I don’t feel good. Then I had some kind of test to check for blood clots in my legs…again negative. The only suggestion was to loose weight (haven’t gained) and wear support hose. Ha!!
Then one day the swelling went down just as quickly as it started. I have no idea why but I am beginning to think it is a sensitivity to some sort of food…I have not been able to figure out what exactly. Now I am eliminating wheat to see if anything changes. I still get swelling but usually at the end of the day and it goes down at night or when I elevate my feet.
I also played golf one time – pulled a muscle in my lower back – and then proceeded to 12 sessions of physical therapy. Much better….but not totally!!
There were days I cried the “ugly” cry because I was just such a total wreck. Very depressing….but damn, I am not taking meds for depression.
I have been off my vegan diet. I did not feel like cooking so stopped somewhere and got food. It was usually a sandwich at night but definitely meat. Breakfast and lunch stayed pretty much vegan. Basically, I didn’t care about self-care and was only existing and not very well.
Now the good part…I have not had alcohol in 60 days. That’s a record. I just decided one day I had enough and have not had any since. I still go out and no one says anything. In fact Jean and Doug go periods without drinking as well. Nobody cares really. I felt a lot worse when drinking so thought I would feel wonderful not drinking. Not so much so being sober definitely is a plus. I don’t want to drink anymore. I’ve had enough. Reminded me of when I stopped smoking…I just stopped. No announcements – no planning – just stopped. For good this time! I’m done. Considering how much I had been drinking, I’m amazed there were so few withdrawal symptoms. The only thing was some insomnia but got through that OK. I’ve lost 12 pounds since – my face looks so much better – I don’t look like a “drunk” anymore with swollen face, bloodshot eyes and red nose. Why is it we don’t know what we look like as long as we are boozers?
This morning I decided to work on my health – not just lip service this time. I watched some videos by my favorite people, Dr. Pam Popper and Dr. Michael Greger (the “How Not To Die” guy). Dr. Popper talked about seniors being over-medicated with hypertension meds. I am taking two very strong one’s. My BP yesterday was 99/64 and today it is 115/68. She said one of the reasons seniors ha so many falls is low blood pressue from being over medicated. She also said there was a major study in Sweden done where patients in nursing homes improved greatly when blood pressure meds reduced. Maybe that could be a little bit of my problem. Today, I am going to reduce one in half – from 200 mg. to 100 mg. day. Then see what happens. I also stopped the “bathroom” pill (that’s what I call it). I only took it for a month and the only thing different was a dry mouth.
I am going back to my completely WFPB diet. I won’t give up the oil just yet but will when I get the WFPB part down. I have reduced salt but still use some. Getting rid of that may or may not come later. It depends on how my blood pressure acts.
Also, back to the gym tomorrow. Maybe some Yoga at home. One thing at a time!